AlterHéros



Repulsed by men since I was raped, I don’t know ...

i was raped when i was 13 and i've adored girls since i was 14 always feeling repulsion for men, never attraction. I tried to act "normal" which also disgusted me, and i slept with 4 men to try and prove how normal i was. This whole act left me dead inside and i was utterly repulsed by me and my actions. I hated being gay and hid it from everyone. When i was twenty i met a man in a bar who i instantly fell for despite finding the male form repulsive. He is wonderful and tender and attentive and perfect, we have been married nearly 11 years. i have recently told him i am a lesbian though i have never had any girlfriends and tried to explain my past and the fact that basically i have lied about being straight. We still have sex and i adore him as a person and tend not to see him as a man, obviously everything is confusing, can you please help. He is very supportive and loving and is trying to understand, but i guess i just can't explain who i am very well. Am i a lesbian?


Our parents caught us kissing and now I have to ...

I've always been a bit of a tomboy, but my parents would never let me do the things I wanted- the only sports they would let me play were the 'girly' ones- figure skating, ringette, soccer, cheerleading, ballet, gymnastics, etc. I guess maybe they figured something out about me at five that it took me years to realize: I'm gay. (My hands are shaking just typing that) I have a girlfriend, the most beautiful, awesome, smart, funny girl in the world. I love her. Nobody knew about us until yesterday, when her mother caught us kissing when we thought nobody was home. We're no longer allowed to see each other and my parents are sending me to Catholic school, because apparently 'this would never have happened in a Catholic school'. They're really, really, really angry. I'm- so many things. I'm terrified, I'm scared, I'm angry, I'm confused, and I'm really depressed. I just want to die, or run away from home and leave this hick town forever. I don't know what to do. Please help.



Did same-sex sexual abuse turn me gay?

I'm 20 years old and would like to know something. It's kind of a weird question to ask, but I will anyways. When I was 7 years old, I was molested by a 40 year old man on several occasions. I didn't know it was a bad thing to do at the age of 7. I feel so betrayed now and hurt. This man was my first sexual contact with anyone and I wanted to know if he made me gay?


Making out with my lesbian friend who has a girlfriend

I am a 16 year old male and I love a lesbian. She is 15. She has a Girlfriend for about 3 months now. She has not all ways been a lesbian but I respect her decision and I love her very much. I have not met her girlfriend yet because she lives in a different state. At one point she dated my best friend, a guy before she dated this girl. She was raped at the age of 12 by a probably 30 year old man. She said I am amazing guy and if she was into guys she would date me. One night about a week ago she spent the night at my house. We played around a little. We flirted, cuddled, kissed, necked and I sucked on her nipple and rubbed her down there. After that we felt guilty because she is still dating her girlfriend. She told me to just forget about what happened that night. I'm wondering she is like truly a lesbian. I am also wonder if me and her can ever be in a relationship.


Why do I find men SO physically unappealing?

I am soon to be 45 and I am self-identified as a lesbian. The reason I have decided that I am a lesbian is because I don't like male biology---from the daily smegma accumulations, to the viscuous, invasive fluids, hard bodies, to the rather cold and analytical manner of relating to others which is governed by testosterone.. Don't get me wrong. I don't hate men. I just can't embrace our differences to like them romantically. My question is, and if you could give this answer more insight than you think I am asking for....; If you could tell me why heterosexual women like these (in my estimation) unappealing attributes.







Am I bisexual?

I think I might be bisexual; I have had fantasies about both men and women, but never really been in a relationship before so I have nothing to compare. I have a friend who is bi and I become uncomfortable if her & her boyfriend start making out, and I'm also uncomfortable changing in front of other women. My mother is Catholic and my family is very clear about their stand on the gay community; and I know that's clouding my judgment. I've never really felt a strong attraction to either sex (at least not that I'm aware of; I lie to myself a lot -is this normal?), but if my dad & brother are watching porn (straight & lesbian) in the room when I'm working on the computer I'll criticize it and pretend to be disgusted but watch it from the corner of my eye. For years I've been questioning my sexuality..... My friend is very open about what she thinks about women's looks and I get uncomfortable when she asks my opinion; I want to agree most of the time but am afraid to... Please help me sort this out.