Thanks for writing in to us at AlterHéros. From the sounds of your post, you're looking for some guidance regarding a possible male to female (MTF) gender transition. As you've said, you like to cross dress and you feel really normal as a girl, ever since you were three years old. In fact, you're so comfortable living as a girl that you would like to pursue a career in female modelling.
First of all, it's great to hear that you've been able to express your gender identity so freely and openly through cross dressing in the general public. You're a very lucky person to be able to do so without having to face prejudice from the people around you. However, the jump from cross dressing and fully transitioning to a biological and psychological female gender identity is a pretty big step.
Noticeably, your post is quite short and gives few details on what you mean by whether or not a change would be the right path for you. Does this mean you want to start permanently dressing as a girl and introducing yourself as Jen (i.e. what some refer to as passing)? Does it mean you're thinking about starting hormone therapy so that your body begins a feminisation process (e.g. softening of the skin, voice changes, thinning body hair, breast development etc
)? Or are you considering surgery to aid you into your transition towards a female
Even though you're eighteen, it's important that you really consider what you want for your future since you have decades ahead of you where you have to live with the decisions you make now. It's important that you educate yourself on all your possible options and then reflect on what you have learned. What is right for you? How would you feel most comfortable? What would you need to do to pursue the rigorous career of modeling? What is your plan?
The following are a few websites that may help you discover all the implications of wanting to transition from a male to female gender identity:
http://www.tsroadmap.com/index.html – This website offers a road map for people considering a transition from MTF
http://www.mtftransition.com/t-girl.htm – A more personal website that details the experiences of a man who underwent the transition from MTF
You'll notice that they are all really long documents that might seem kind of tedious to read through. If, however, you're serious about “becoming” a girl, it is crucial that you inform yourself so you know exactly what you're getting into. Hopefully you'll learn a lot about the process and will be able to figure out whether or not a change is the right path for you.
Here is also an article about Lea T., a transwoman who has beoame quite well known in the modelling industry:
If you have any other specific questions that aren't covered in the websites above, or you want to give us more details on your particular situation, please feel free to write us back. Until then, good luck and happy reading!
K-Wo for AlterHéros