“Homosexuality is a choice. People who are gay could change if they wanted to do so.”

FACT: Almost all studies show that no one, gay or straight, can change their sexual orientation. Our orientation is almost certainly determined sometime between conception and the first years of life. Gay and straight people might be able to change their behavior but not their underlying orientation. We do not, however, choose our sexual orientation – homosexuality is not a choice.

“Being gay is a form of illness.”

FACT The American Psychological Association says, “It is no more abnormal or sick to be gay than to be left-handed.

“I don’t know any people who are gay.”

FACT You may not know any persons who are out to you as being gay. In a classroom of 30 persons, for instance, there are probably 2-3 persons who are gay. Estimates are that 1 person out of 10 is gay.

“You can identify someone as being gay or lesbian by their mannerisms or physical characteristics – gay men are effeminate & lesbians are masculine.”

FACT Gay people are as diverse as are straight persons. Only a small percentage of gay people fit the stereotypes. For example, not all gay men are muscular. As is the case among heterosexuals, some homosexuals like weight training while others do not. Yet people may get the impression that all gay men are muscular because the media often focuses on images of muscular men when covering gay issues (ex. Pride festivities) or in publicity targeted to homosexuals.

“If a person has sex with someone of the same gender, then he/she automatically becomes a homosexual”

FACT A person can choose to have a sexual experience with someone of the same gender without being homosexual – a person may simply be exploring his/her sexuality while another may simply be curious or want to try something new.

It is also true that gays and lesbians can have sex with people of the opposite gender without necessarily becoming heterosexual.

“All gay men catch AIDS”

FACT Since the first cases of HIV infection were discovered in gay men, AIDS has often erroneously been associated with the gay community. AIDS is a disease that does not discriminate; HIV infects men, women, heterosexuals, homosexuals, Quebeckers, Ontarians, etc. HIV is transmitted through contact with human fluids and has nothing to do with sexual orientation.

“In a gay relationship, one person plays the husband (butch) and the other plays the wife (femme) role.”

FACT Since laws, churches and society have typically condemned, or at least ignored, the relationships of gay persons, most gay persons do not feel an obligation to follow “the rules” of what a relationship is to look like. Most gays and lesbians, therefore, create very different relationships based on equality and who each person is, rather than upon societal roles. In fact, since most gay and lesbian persons run their relationships without a model, the look of each relationship varies greatly from that of other relationships.

“Gay and lesbian persons are promiscuous.”

FACT Some are and some aren’t, just as the same can be said for straight persons.

“Men who are gay and women who are lesbians want to be another gender or have simply not found the right person.”

FACT Almost all of the males enjoy being men and almost all of the women enjoy being women. They simply are attracted to, and fall in love with, persons of their same gender.

“People who are gay cannot maintain long-term relationships.”

FACT Just like heterosexual people, persons who are gay form a variety of relationships that last a short time or many years. Heterosexuals even have a divorce rate of 50% while nobody knows about the length of relationships of gay persons since they are not allowed to marry in most countries around the world though this is slowly changing – homosexuals were recently allowed to marry by law in the Netherlands and will also be allowed to do the same in the province of Quebec in Canada.

“Gay people are child molesters and recruit children to their lifestyle.”

FACT By far, the majority of child molesters are heterosexual men. Furthermore, one does not choose to be gay just as one does not choose to be straight. One only decides whether to act on his/her orientation.

“Persons who are gay do not understand how to make a good family.”

FACT One in every four families has a gay or lesbian person within that family several studies suggest. Studies also show that there is no difference between gay and straight persons in their quality or ability to care, love or raise children.

“Persons who are gay are protected and granted equal rights.”

FACT Only a few states and a few cities and organizations include gay persons in their policies of nondiscrimination. Gay persons are not allowed to get married, are not given the same financial rights as straight couples, do not have to be allowed in to see their partner who is ill in a hospital and so forth.

“In a gay relationship, one person plays the husband (butch) and the other plays the wife (femme) role.”

FACT: Since laws, churches and society have typically condemned, or at least ignored, the relationships of gay persons, most gay persons do not feel an obligation to follow “the rules” of what a relationship is to look like. Most gays and lesbians, therefore, create very different relationships based on equality and who each person is, rather than upon societal roles. In fact, since most gay and lesbian persons run their relationships without a model, the look of each relationship varies greatly from that of other relationships.