18 avril 2006

Is it normal that i like girls but i don't want to have sex with them ?

Since i remember i been attracted to girls always want to be around them and not the guys. i had a boyfriend for about four years and i broke up with him cause i didnt like him anymore. my best friend was the only one i wanted to talk but she was married and with two kids. we fight as we were a couple. we both hide that we were lesbians till nine months ago that she open herself and told me that she was dating my other friend. my heart was broken for hiding the love towards her. now she lives with her girl and i still miss her sometimes. but i am confused as i go with my life i see and learn more about lesbians. like sex i dont like having sex. is it normal that i like girls but i dont want to have sex?


Hi Silvia,

Thanks for writing to Alterheros. I think, a short answer to your question about whether it is normal to like women but not want to have sex, is, it depends. Maybe you could reflect a bit on why it is that you are not interested in sex? It may be that you just haven’t met the right person, or the opportunity hasn’t come up. I think if you are attracted to someone, and the feeling is mutual, then eventually it may become sexual. Of course there is also no rush in moving from attraction to a sexual relationship.

On the other hand, some people have very few sexual attraction. And, other people have no sexual attraction at all. That’s totally normal, and nothing to be ashamed of. We lived in a very sexual society, where sexuality has a big emphasis. But, each person has his or her level of sexual desire, that starts from zero to infinity…

I hope this helps, and you are welcome to write back again if you have other questions.

Best regards,

Andrea, Alterheros