So from what I understand, you identify as a gender fluid person, who’s more on the masculine side of the spectrum and also non-binary. However, you question your potential transmasculine identity because of your interest in “feminine” things.

First, I have to tell you that gender identity is a feeling inside of you and everything exterior (for example, the fact that you sometimes enjoy feminine things) doesn’t impact your identity!
Gender expression is another thing and is how you decide to present yourself to others, for example, by how you dress, your haircut, the pronoms you use and many other things.

You can feel more masculine without necessarily wanting to be a man or feeling like a man. That is a pretty common sentiment in the transmasculine community, because of everything that is attached to cis mens (privilege, domination, violence).

You’re asking what you should do. I feel like it’s very important to you to find a gender identity that will suit you. I understand that it can be very significant and a huge relief to find who you are and a community of people who are living the same experiences. However, I just want to tell you that it’s not absolutely necessary to find one identity to define yourself, that it can change over time (gender can be fluid) and you are only 15, experiences will lead your way (especially if you’re questioning yourself at such a young age)!

Here’s a list of non-binary identities if you want to look more into it.

There’s also an answer to a question on our website that I think might help you.

I hope this answer will be helpful!
Do not hesitate to write back to us if you feel the need to!

Camille (elle/she)