1 February 2021
Is there a label for if your gender is not in the binary, but sometimes more masc leaning and sometimes more fem leaning?
I was wondering if there’s a label for if you feel that your gender is not in the binary, but sometimes you feel more masc leaning and sometimes you feel more fem leaning.
Thanks for trusting AlterHeros with your question about gender labels. It seems you were wondering if there was a label for someone whose gender is not in the binary but who sometimes feels more masculine, and other times more feminine. The answer is yes, there are actually many different labels that people outside of the gender binary may identify with that line up with what you’ve described.
The gender binary is a way that people may express or interact with their gender, and generally a person who fits within the gender binary considers themselves to be either male or female, all of the time, and does not experience fluctuation or change in this identity. Anyone who doesn’t identify with the labels male or female all of the time, or whose gender identity changes over time, might choose to identify themselves by one (or several) of a number of different labels to express the way that they experience gender.
What you’ve described in your question is someone who does not identify with the gender binary, and experiences a fluctuation with their gender experience, where sometimes they might feel more feminine and other times more masculine. Someone who experiences gender in this way might identify with many different labels, which could include (but is not limited to) the following: non-binary, genderfluid, bigender, or agender.
Perhaps the most common term for those who exist outside of the binary, is non-binary, which is also sometimes expressed as enby. For many, non-binary is an umbrella term which simply means outside of the gender binary and can include a number of other gender identities. As an example, one non-binary people might present their gender (via clothing, mannerisms, etc.) in a way which is generally considered to be masculine and use he/him pronouns, while another non-binary person may present their gender in a more ambiguous way and use gender neutral pronouns such as they/them. Both of these people might identify as non-binary, even though they express and experience their gender in different ways.
A person who identifies as genderfluid, experiences a change in their gender identity over time. As an example. they may identify as a man sometimes, as non-binary sometimes, and as a woman at other times. Someone whose gender is fluid may also experience a change in the intensity of their gender, such as feeling very intensely masculine/feminine at times and at other times only loosely identifying with the ideas of masculinity and femininity.
The term bigender can describe someone who identifies with two different genders (either at the same time or at different times). These two genders might be male or female, or they can be two other gender identities.
Another label, agender, can describe someone who does not identify with any gender. Someone who does not identify as male or female, or with any other gender identity, might consider themselves to be agender. An agender person might also consider their gender to be neutral, or they may refer to themselves as being genderless.
I want to make it clear to you that, although I have outlined a few different gender labels that might correspond or relate to the gender identity you described in your question, this is not an exhaustive list, and that there are many other labels that describe people who exist outside of the gender binary. You are certainly under no obligation to choose to identify with one of the labels that I’ve written about (or any label for that matter).
Labels, like the ones we’ve talked about here, can sometimes be helpful to describe the way that we think about gender, whether we’re talking about our individual gender or gender more broadly, but they’re ultimately just words that we use as tools to try to explain a very complex human phenomenon. There’s no right answer when it comes to gender. Also, the label that you identify with today may not be (and certainly doesn’t have to be) the same label you identify with tomorrow, next week, or ten years from now. Some people who don’t identify with the gender binary have a very specific point of view when it comes to their gender, while others might not know how to explain their identify. Others might simply not care about labels or not care about trying to explain their gender. All of these experiences are valid.
I hope this longwinded answer helped you out, and please remember that your experience with your gender is yours and no one else’s. You’re under no obligation to label yourself in any specific way (or at all if you don’t want to)!
Thanks again for contacting AlterHeros, and trusting us with your question!
All the best,
Matt at AlterHeros