I have a crush on my work colleague who flirts but is already seeing someone.

Hi Pearlina!

Thanks for your question!

First, let me say it’s great that you are sufficiently comfortable with yourself to consider that you may be bi! And having a crush is exhilarating, although it can also be nerve-wracking!

Sounds like your coworker likes you and that you are starting to develop a friendship! Now whether she is bi (or queer) and attracted to you or she is just being friendly I cannot tell. But I would encourage you to explore. Invite her for coffee or lunch. Get to know each other. You may be able to tell from what she says to you about her past whether she is attracted to women and available for dating.

Other than that, it might just take some time, and asking her questions, at first more vague, and finally more definite, to decide whether or not she is interested in you as more than just a friend or workmate. It may be intimidating to directly ask her, but at least then you will know once and for all what her flirtations mean.

Good luck! Let us know if we can help you with anything else.

Rimma, for Alterheros.

About Rimma Orenman

She has a B.A. in Anthropology, an M.D.C.M. degree from McGill, and has started her psychiatry residency, also at McGill, in 2008.

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