31 January 2007

Was it right to explain to my kid that me and my partner are a same-sex couple ?

I just came out of the closet a couple of month’s back.I have two boy’s there seven and six, now the seven year old is the articulate one it’s like he’s been here before; I recently got into a relationship with my best friend of five year’s but for my son’s they know her as their aunt. So naturally, I had to explain to him that we are a couple now some people think that I shouldn’t have went there but I figure he is a new aged child he’ll pick up if I don’t explain to him. Did I do the right thing or was I wrong should I have waited until he was old enough to under stand?



Hi Nicole,

Thank you for writing to AlterHeros. The first thing to note is that coming out to children is never easy, especially when they are our own. There are no guidelines indicating at what age children should know about their parents sexual orientation. Even if your oldest child is seven, there are things he is capable of understanding. Talking to your child about your relationship with your best friend can be explained in terms of feelings such as love and caring for another person. He may not get everything at first, he is still young. Having similar conversations about your child’s feelings, your relationship and his comprehension could benefit the relationship you have with him. It is important for you to listen to him. Remember that his reactions may vary as he gets older and as he goes through the different stages of growing up. Communication is a key factor in your relationship with your children.

Good luck

Andréanne, AlterHeros