Hi S,

Thanks for asking us that question, I’ll try to answer you to the best of my abilities!

So you’re wondering how to manage dating as an asexual person.

By that, do you mean how is it different for you than someone who is allosexual (meaning people who are not on the asexuality spectrum)?

Do you want concrete dating advice or resources where you can find other asexual people?

Dating sites can be a great tool for you because you can specify that you’re asexual in your bio as well as write what you are looking for in another person. That way, your intentions are clear and people with whom you’ll start a conversation technically will be aware and on board with that. You can also search for other asexual people if you want. Dating sites are becoming more inclusive and a few have the option to choose asexual as a sexual orientation noted in your profile (for example: OkCupid)

In general, while dating I advise you to state your intentions and make sure that the other person understands that you have little or no interest in sex. Maybe not in the first five minutes of conversation, because it can be weird to directly talk about sex, but as soon as you feel comfortable to do so! If you find it hard to introduce the subject, what I like to do is talk about queer stuff (orientation, identity, monogamy or ethical non-monogamy) so you can naturally open up more about your experience with asexuality.

Another tip is to know what you want and not cross your boundaries exceed your limits because of pressure from someone else. That is easier said than done, but I think it’s important for anyone who is in the dating sphere.

If you want to read about other people’s experiences with asexuality and dating, there are some threads online that are worth looking at, for example:   https://www.reddit.com/r/asexualdating/

https://www.asexuality.org/en/forum/7-asexual-relationships/

There is also a community from Montreal that is active online and that sometimes meet up to do activities, here is their website:  https://www.meetup.com/fr-FR/Montreal-Asexuals-Communaute-Asexuelle-de-Montreal/

This facebook group is also pretty active: https://www.facebook.com/groups/23215310684/?ref=group_header

I hope that was helpful!

Do not hesitate to write to us again if you have another question.

Camille (elle/she)