15 December 2007

I'm Bisexual, And I Don't Know How To Tell My Parents

I’m Bisexual, And I Don’t Know How To Tell My Parents.
My Dad Always Jokes Around About Gays, And How They Look/Talk Funny, So I Don’t Know How He Will React To This Situation… Is There Anything That I Can Do To Help Me Tell My Parents?

sarah eidelmans

Hi Sophie,

Thank you for your question.

Talking to parents about your sexual orientation can be really hard. It seems like you are afraid your parents (particularly your dad) will not be very receptive at first.

If you do choose to talk to your parents about how you identify and who you are attracted to, it might make it easier if your parents have more information about bisexuality/homosexuality. Sometimes it is very difficult for parents to be understanding of what you tell them because they themselves do not clearly understand what is being talked about. Organizations such as Project 10 or Jeunesse Lambda (if you live in Montreal) have some helpful information on their websites that you might want to check out or show to your parents.

On the other hand, in terms of your father’s behavior, I do have to say that, at times, mocking certain issues is due to an insufficient understanding what it means to make fun of that issue or those people. If your father’s behavior is hurtful to you, you might want to bring that up and discuss this with him; in fact, it is possible he has no idea that making jokes about gay individuals is offensive to you.

Finally, keep in mind that no one requires you to use the label “bisexual.” If this is a term you identify with, then I do think the people you love should support you completely in this decision. However, there is no rule saying you have to pick a term that describes yourself based on who you are attracted to or not attracted to.

Good luck, Sophie. Again, thanks so much for your question. I think you are very brave for being so proactive in figuring out how to deal with your parents and how to communicate with them, because it is often something that is not at all easy to do.

Take care,

S., for AlterHéros