25 septembre 2023

I feel suicidal about a guy who won't return my calls

I met a 32 yo straight guy at a straight bar in December and brought him back to my place. I offered to give him a massage and he flipped and left, but before he leaves, he confesses to me that he is curious. We exchanged phone numbers and we spoke once, but then he didn’t respond to my text message so I left him alone. Over the summer, I started thinking about how I enjoyed his company that night and how I was impressed with his interest in my personality. So, I called him back but two weeks passed by and he didn’t call me back. Therefore, I call him and he told me that he would call me back that night or the day after. He still hasn’t called me back. I am feeling suicidal lately and I feel quite depressed over this, I feel so unloved and unappreciated. I wish I could have him in my arms and tell him how much I miss him and care about him. Can you guys please help me? I can’t take this pain anymore.



I'm so glad you came to AlterHeros for help! First of all, do not do anything drastic. No man is worth you ruining your life over. There will be other men, but you are individual and unique.

Now, to the man: He may be taking a while to contact you because he is unsure or uncomfortable with the feelings he is discovering. If, at the age of 32, he is just discovering and coming to terms with the fact that he may be queer, he is doubtlessly quite troubled and unsure of his next move. Allow him to contact you, don't pressure him- he is probably very fragile right now.

On to you: if you are becoming depressed or having suicidal thoughts over this guy, leave them at the door. He is not worth it- nobody is worth you questioning the value of your life. If he does not respond, back off. There are other fish in the sea and even though it hurts now, it will get better. Getting out and meeting new people may lessen the initial pain you feel at the response of this man,.

Finally, let me repeat, do not do anything drastic. If you are feeling suicidal or like injuring yourself, seek professional help immediately. Your life is too precious to waste, and people care about you..

If you are having suicidal thoughts, please contact Suicide Action Montreal at 514.723.4000

or the Trevor Project, a GLBTQ suicide prevention hotline at 866.4.U.Trevor (866.488.7386)

Hang in there.

For Alterheros,