Making friends (or more!) with girls

Hi I just had a question but before I tell you guys I just wanted to say thanks for the advice on what to do to get this girl to noticed me and thanks to Hillary and I just wanted to ask what kind of words should I use to approach nice, not to nice and not to mean, or mean girls so that they will like me as a friend and maybe more than just a friend, maybe a boyfriend, so what kind of words should I use to approach girls and by the way I’m in 7th grade but the year is almost over. I’m almost 13

Hillary Greer

Hi again Walter! It’s great to hear that the last answer was helpful to you. I hope I can do the same again!

This time it sounds like you’re asking what the best way is to talk to any kind of girl in order to become closer with her (whether as a friend or boyfriend). This is difficult because, as I’m sure you know, each and every person you are going to meet in your life is going to be different. Everyone likes different things whether it’s music, food, clothes, movies, books, or other people. Some girls will like people who are funny, some girls will like people who are romantic, some girls will like people who are sporty, and some girls might not even like people! You never know who you are going to meet and what they are going to be looking for, so there is really no magical way to approach a girl. It’s the same with girls as it is with boys. You chose your friends because you enjoy spending time with them and have the same interests, a girl will choose to be friends (or more) with you for the same reasons. So Walter, all you can do is be yourself. Do what you like to do, participate in activities that you love, talk to people who you have something in common with.

If you see someone you might be interested in, it’s always a good idea to try to learn more about them. So go up to her, ask some questions (ask if she’s seen a certain movie, or if she went to see the school’s sports game last Friday, for example) and see if you have anything in common to talk about. It is not a good idea to put on an act or pretend to be something you’re not just so that other people will like you, because it probably won’t last. Relationships (whether romantic or friendly) are based on honesty, so you need to be honest about who you are.

In the meantime though, maybe just have fun! It might be a good idea to stop putting so much importance on meeting girls and getting a girlfriend. Have you ever heard the saying ‘everything happens when you least expect it’? Well it’s quite true. Often, as soon as you stop looking for something or focusing on it, that’s when it happens. I understand how nice it is to have a girlfriend, but it is also important to focus on yourself and having fun. A girlfriend will come with time!

I hope this helps you. Feel free to write in again!

Hillary, for Alterheros.