Category: Questionning you gender identity


I’ve been struggling with my gender identity… Is the want ...

I've been struggling with my gender identity for the past couple of months, though I feel like this has been an ongoing thing I never noticed until now. Every spare moment I have I'm questioning who I am, who I want to be, and who I want to be perceived as. The main issue is that I don't feel comfortable being seen as a girl anymore. I've tried using some different pronouns to see how I felt, and it was nice for a bit, but I realized there was still something missing. I think I'm still in a lot of denial over how what's missing is the fact that I want to be perceived as a boy, but I feel like I can't have that, because physically, it's logical that I'm not one. Plus, I'm scared of even considering transitioning, it feels like a huge step that I don't know if I'll ever be ready for. While most of the time I'm yearning to be a guy, there are a few times where I feel okay as a girl. It's just so confusing, and I don't want to stick with something and then regret it later. I also feel like, is the want to be a man a fetishization thing? Because when I see healthy and happy male relationships in books or shows, I feel a sense of happiness from it and can relate to it to an extent. Does that mean these feelings of dysphoria are based on that? Because while it's one thing to put yourself in another character's shoes, I feel like there's a bit more to these feelings than that. Any insight would be really appreciated! Bao


I like to cross-dress as a female, does this make ...

Much like a question I saw on your site, I like to crossdress in private & wish I was female. I love looking at the female body but wish I was one. When I crossdress I pretend I'm with a man and I masturbate. When I have sex with a woman I fantasize about being her or that I'm a woman & she's a man. I've been with lots of women but feel I'm more inclined to want to be a woman. I'm not sure if I'm gay because men do nothing for me unless I'm dressed & fantasizing about being a woman. But I know most women will not accept me as I am so should I date men? Am I a homosexual? I'm very confused right now. I have a daughter and a very religious family so I can't be a full time crossdresser.


I never hated my gender, but I’ve never really liked ...

Hello, I'm a sixteen year old girl. I recently have started looking at Youtube videos of FTM people and have been suddenly entranced. I don't have the 'always liked boys stuff' stories that they have, but when I was younger I was outgoing and happy. I wore dresses and played with dolls, but I played sports and got the dresses dirty, and played 'zombies' with my headless Barbies. Then as I got older I started to retreat within myself. I talked a lot less and felt more and more uncomfortable with who I was. I never hated my gender, but I've never really liked who I was, I felt I should be different. Now I'm so confused. I do have a tendency to randomly give myself identities, trying to find myself. But I've never felt so confused or scared like this, and definitely never wanted to talk about it. I don't know what to do and I desperately need someone to understand. I know this road is so much harder and I am really scared. Any help would be appreciated.



I don’t want to be considered a boy or a ...

I would not like to be considered a boy or a girl. I am not sexually attracted to just boys or just girls, in fact neither. I feel as though physical attraction can turn me on and I do enjoy "sex" (or in my case masturbation). However I feel confused as to what this exactly means. I don't feel as though I should be judged upon my sex. I feel comfort in feeling as though I fit into a group but right now I'm more or less just outside any group circles. I've searched for a word to describe me to others, instead of having to say this every time. So what exactly am I? I've never been sexually attracted to male or female parts. Because I am still a virgin, people think this is just a phase or I haven't experienced life enough to know but I know this is who I am, its just all so confusing! I just wish I could scream out at the top of my lungs exactly who I am, but what am I?


Should I take hormones to become a girl?

I'm a girl trapped in a boy's body. I've only cross-dressed once, but it was the best feeling of my life! The thought of painting my nails and wearing make-up gives me amazing thrills. Is it a good idea to use horomones (when I'm in college) and completely and legally change my identity so that no one knows that i was John but was always Mckayla?


My wife keeps saying she is happy with my cross-dressing ...

Hello I'm in the UK. I hope you can give me some advice. From my earliest years I have dressed in female clothes, this has brought me comfort, arousal, happiness and comfort. I have been married for 16 years and my wife and I love each other very much. She tells me that she doesn't mind my "hobby" but I always feel awkward when dressed with her. I seem to go through a yearly cycle of repressing everything and then getting to a point where I can't restrain my inclination to wear my clothes/make-up etc. My wife keeps saying she is happy with my dressing but I am sure she is not. I don't want to hurt her or do anything which will destroy our marriage but I feel as though I am living with a bursting dam behind me. I can't ask you whether I am transsexual or a transvestite but if you could give me some advice I'd be very grateful. Many thanks!



I just feel I am more comfortable in the opposite ...

Hi, this is kinda embarrassing for me to say, but I just wanted to pose a question. Ever since I was little I was a tomboy. I was roughty and I liked to have fun. But now I'm 13 and things have changed a little. I just feel like I am more comfortable in the opposite gender. One Halloween my friends dared me to be a guy and I did. I wore a wig and it was really believable. I was hanging with some guys and they thought I was a guy too. They played rough with me, but they were careful because I'm really thin. I just felt like I belonged and I was more comfortable with the opposite gender. Also, I definitely DO NOT like girls, I like guys. I'm afraid to talk to my mom, so what's going on with me? Is there something wrong with me?


I am worried that I may be transsexual because I ...

I think I am starting to realise that I may be transsexual. I don't find girls attractive and most of the time I imagine myself in my head as being a female. I am worried if these are signs that I am transsexual and what would be the steps to take afterwards if I found out I am one.


I hate myself because I’m a female

Well I have had very hard conversations lately with my mother and the love of my life. I was born with male chemicals in some areas of my brain instead of female. My mother suggested a sex change. My love, who I have known for 4 years said it would matter to him what I was as long as I was with... he's not the straightest man on earth... But at the moment I live with my aunt and uncle who are very "strict christains" and hate the idea of anything of this nature... I don't know what to do about them or how to tell them...??? The main problem for me at the moment is self confidence... I honestly hate myself beause I'm a female...