24 June 2005

I think I might be bisexual

I think I might be bisexual. I met this girl named Amby a few months ago and I can’t stop thinking about her. I miss her a lot and I really want to be around her again. I like guys and all, but I’ve never liked a guy like I like Amby. Can you help me? I want to be straight .I’m really ashamed and afraid.


Hi Amanda,

Your feelings of confusion are really common in guys and girls of your age who are discovering and building their sexual identity. Your feelings of confusion will slowly disappear, and, in time, you will start seeing a much clearer picture of who you are. Unfortunately, there is no instant recipe and no predetermined amount of time for confirming your sexual identity.

Yes, you might be bisexual or you may have just been attracted to a really great person. What is remarkable in kids under 10 is how honest and straightforward they are. If you have a younger cousin or sibling, you’ll notice how sometimes they’ll just say things innocently and truthfully, things that adults wouldn’t dare say, like “that man has big ears.” This could be embarrassing for the parent, but the child has simply noticed something different from what they have experienced and says it.

When falling in love or being in your first relationships a young teenager, your love is pure. As a teen, your understanding of love hasn’t been clouded by negative situations like breakups, jealousy, betrayal, and all the other factors that make up lust, relationships and love.

So give yourself some time. Take all the time you need to build good, honest friendships with young people your age. By getting to know different people, from different backgrounds, with different family situations, of different ethnic backgrounds, and with different habits – you will discover and get to know yourself better.

Don’t worry about it and just let it happen.

There’s no way to change your sexual identity, what ever it may be. You can choose to hide or suppress who you really are, but that is up to you.

Team AlterHeros